How to Talk so Kids will Listen Parenting Workshops
Battling Tantrums? Power plays? Selective hearing?
- Mary hates her haircut and won't come out of her room...
- Tom was rude to your Mum...
- Sam didn't do his homework...
- Jenny told a lie...
- Alex refuses to get dressed...
Hi, I'm Nicky. PhD/Masters qualified Psychologist, and constantly-learning Mum of two under 5. I look forward to helping you solve these problems.
Learn skills that make life with children easier and more satisfying!
The goal of the How To Talk So Kids Will Listen (TM) Group Workshop is to give you practical, effective methods of communication that will make your relationship with children of all ages less stressful and more rewarding. You will learn how to:
- Discipline without hurting or alienating
- Cope with your child's negative feelings
- Engage your child's willing cooperation
- Help your child develop a realistic and positive self-image
- Foster an atmosphere of love and respect
- Resolve conflicts peacefully
What the Sessions Cover
- Week 1: Helping Children Deal With Their Feelings.
Exploration of what happens to children when their feelings are denied. Specific skills that help children to recognise and cope with their negative feelings - disappointment, envy, frustration, resentment, anger etc. Ways to accept children's feelings, limit unacceptable behaviour, and still maintain goodwill. - Week 2: Engaging Cooperation.
How children react to the usual methods to get them to cooperate: threats, warnings, orders, name-calling, sarcasm, lecturing etc. Five ways to invite cooperation that will leave parents and children feeling good about themselves and each other. - Week 3: Alternatives to Punishment.
How do children react to punishment? Is it necessary to rely upon punishment as a means of discipline? Some alternatives to punishment that enable parents to express their strong disapproval as well as encourage children to assume responsibility for their behaviour.
- Week 4: Encouraging Autonomy.
Ways to help children become increasingly independent, responsible people who can one day function on their own. Specific skills that help children to develop their own inner resources. - Week 5: Praise.
An exploration of the kinds of praise that build a positive and realistic self-image and the kinds that do not. A variety of ways to help our children become aware of their strengths so that they can put them into action. - Week 6: Freeing Children from Playing Roles.
A look at how children are sometimes cast into roles (bully, whiner, dawdler, mischief-make etc.) and how we can free them from playing out those roles. Six skills that you can use to help children see themselves in a different and more positive light.
- Week 7: Recap and Exploration of Real Issues.
The last session is an opportunity to review everything we have learned, apply it to real situations that you are facing right now, and build a strategy to maintain the positive changes you are seeing in your family life.
What do workshops involve?
Workshops include 7 sessions of 2 hours each, with about about 10 parents with kids of a similar age to yours. We will learn 30 skills through individual and paired practice, and group discussions. You will get the opportunity to practice with your kids throughout the week, then debrief on progress at the start of each new session.
Approaches that appeal to Parents and Researchers.
Why did I choose to convene "How to talk so kids will listen"TM workshops out of the many great parenting workshops available?
Practical tips that parents can use every day.
These workshops are based on the book "How to Talk so Kids will Listen, and Listen so Kids will Talk" by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. This book is 30 years old and still a best seller. Workshops have been run for years and improved with time. I think a large part of the books popularity is that the tips are very clear and practical, but also non-prescriptive. These 30 skills provide firm but kind approaches that can be applied to whatever issues you are facing.
The approach is Psychologically valid.
The techniques taught fit well with current theories of motivation, particularly Self Determination Theory, and learning, particularly promoting a Growth Mindset, and other psychological principles such as parental responsiveness. The book and workshops have accumulated a lot of anecdotal and case study support over the years, and formal evaluation is underway. Workshops are currently being evaluated, and so far, results are extremely promising.
Will this approach fit with my philosophy, kids, and situation?
I can't answer that, but I can help you decide.
These podcast episodes discuss the autonomy supportive approach taught in the workshops. Listen to them by clicking the links below:
Autonomy Supportive Parenting Style Part 1
Autonomy Supportive Parenting Style Part 2
For the philosophy behind the approach, read "Liberated Parents, Liberated Children".
For the specific skills that workshops work through read "How to Talk so Kids will Listen, and How to Listen so Kids will Talk". (Affiliate Links - Thank you!) These books will be provided as part of the course if you do choose to participate.
Hang on, if I can learn all the skills from a book why attend workshops?
If you can learn the skills and put them into practice from the book, that is great! Many parents find it helpful to set aside a couple of hours a week to practice and discuss the skills with other parents, and to try using the skills with their kids knowing that they will have the opportunity to discuss their progress at the end of the week.
Join a "How to Talk so Kids will Listen"TM Workshop
Workshops will be running in Sydney's North Shore from July 2017, with a view to running online workshops in the future.
This is an opportunity to grow your parenting toolbox. With these skills you will be modelling effective, respectful communication to your child. In time, you will start to see your child able to use those same communication skills.
Register to find out when and where the next event will be held, or to be notified when courses go online.
Dr Nicole Weeks
"How to Talk so Kids will Listen"TM Workshop Facilitator
Workshop Facilitator
About the Author
Nicky has been studying and working in Psychology since 2002, with a particular focus on human motivation and decision making. When she became a parent, apparently simple concepts, such as consistency, choice, and unconditional love suddenly became more complicated. Since becoming a parent in 2012, Nicky has focused her research on how to apply psychological principles and research to real-life parenting.
Nicky has a strong foundation of psychological knowledge guiding her, but she is facilitating these workshops primarily as a parent, who doesn't have all the answers, and who is continually trying to break old parenting habits and build new ones.
Frequently Asked Questions
Are these workshops designed for parents of any particular age group?
Are these workshops appropriate for people with different social, economic, and ethnic backgrounds?
Will the books be provided?
How much work will it require?
How much does it cost?
Further Questions? Please Contact Me.
Parenting is difficult. Life with kids can be very trying. If you practice these skills, you will notice changes in your child's reactions and your reactions that make parenting more rewarding and enjoyable. You will start to see your children copy your respectful communication style with you, their siblings, and their friends. Importantly, you will be giving your child the skills to trust their feelings and communicate them respectfully. These are important life skills. These skills are not age-specific, they can benefit any relationship, and so will continue to be useful for you and your child throughout life. Does that sound worth investing in?
Yes, I want to start learning these skills now!